i once had a two day crush on the prinicipal from the simpsons

This one time my belt was too loose and I was taking my lab apron off in biology class and my pants fell down

Getting married ruins relationships in my opinion, you don't need a legal paper to prove your love

Today I had decided to tell my crush I liked her and instead I asked her to marry me. I laughed it off and told her I was just nervous. I am going on a date with her tonight, i'm a pretty lucky guy 😌

i once clogged the school toilet with bread. yes... bread...

My mom visited my apartment when I wasn't feeling well and started screaming at me and threatened to kick me out of my own place because my room wasn't cleaned up. I'm not even safe in my own place :(

As a teacher i literally hide from my students when i see them in public

I didn't understand why my dog was licking my belly and sleeping near it instead of near my feet (as usual). Turns out he knew I was pregnant before I did.

back when i was 9 and broke my wrist my dad said "is there blood? no? youre fine"... Thanks dad...

i lie about my age to all my online friends. I have only told one friend my real age and dont have the balls to tell the rest. Its just a thing i did when I was younger but i cant get out of it anymore because now itd be embarassing if they found out i had been lying for years...